Little rituals, big difference

On tiny acts of care, stolen moments of calm, and one unexpected new habit...

I joked in my last letter that I no longer really have “downtime” for myself lately (the mom life!). But what downtime I do get, I’ve treasured.

These days, my downtime—or little slivers of leisure time—might look like this, ranked by how much time I’ve got…

• One hour: Hopping into bed early to read a book. This, hands down, is my favorite type of leisure time. Even just an hour of reading in bed—with no screens, no talking, and a slightly-too-warm blanket—is a kind of domestic euphoria. The older I get, the more sacred 9 p.m. feels. I admit this doesn’t happen as often as I’d like. It’s the usual things that get in the way, like catching up on work while sitting on the couch or folding that enormous pile of laundry I’ve been ignoring all week, and suddenly it’s 9:30 pm. Or maybe my husband and I want to try out a new show and I end up getting sucked in. (I know that watching shows is fun and counts as downtime, but it’s not nearly as blissful and relaxing as reading, for me at least!)

  

  My current can’t-put-it-down read.

• Fifteen minutes: Tackling one neglected corner of our home. I tend to accumulate a lot of stuff (books, beauty, and stationery hoarding tendencies, mostly), and the only way to manage this is to go on organizing sprees. I set a timer on my watch for fifteen minutes and see how much I can accomplish in that time. I’m usually pleasantly surprised. This past week, my organizing project was my closet, which I try to do every three months or so.

  

  I can actually SEE most of the items in my closet. Revolutionary!!

• Five minutes: Staring off into the distance. LOL! No, but really. We’re lucky to have a yard, which means my favorite place to stare off into the distance is in our backyard. It gives my eyes a needed break from my screen, which I’m no doubt hunched over at any given moment. I enjoy watching the trees sway. We have the prettiest blue jays and red cardinals who like to visit. Nature is healing, etc.

  

  This gorgeous gal bloomed last week. Called Adam’s Needle, for the curious.

• Adding just *one* additional step to my skincare routine. There’s plenty of eye-rolling around the idea of “skincare as self-care,” but I’ve come to appreciate it, especially in this season of life. So much of my physical effort is spent brushing tiny teeth and slathering someone else in sunscreen. It feels grounding to turn that attention back toward myself, even if it’s just a thirty-second swipe of eye cream or exfoliating pad that gives the illusion of a glow (even if I’m running on less sleep than I’d like).

But the little ritual I want to talk about today that I think has made a big difference in my life lately has been getting to the gym.

If you know me, that might be surprising—I’ve never been a “gym person.” Even during my peak fitness years (hello, 10-mile outdoor runs!), it took major effort to step foot in a gym.

But lately I’ve been getting up, getting dressed, and physically leaving the house to move my body, and it’s been kind of transformational. As someone who works from home, the simple act of leaving the house before 9 a.m. feels radical. I like to pretend I’m commuting—to somewhere important—when I’m really just driving ten minutes to sweat mildly on a treadmill. As the weather warms up, this little ritual has become even more pleasant; I listen to a favorite podcast (these days it’s been Gloss Angeles if I want something fun, or Fiction Matters if I want something bookish) on the way there, which feels like an additional treat.

I keep things simple: the treadmill, stairmaster, or a few machines. It’s not really about “crushing” my workout. It’s about getting out of the house and doing something for myself at the start of each day that doesn’t involve screens (*huge*), or being productive, or for parenting, or for checking something off a list. It’s just for me to feel good in my body and my brain.

One thing that’s helped make this routine stick has been having a go-to gym uniform. I’m sharing mine below, and I would love to hear yours if you’ve got one.

My current gym essentials…

1. Bombas socks: I cleared out all my other socks last year because this is the only brand whose socks have longevity and won’t wear down after a year or so. I like the slightly compressive and cushioned feel of the running ankle socks, and the quarter-length socks are my go-to daily choice for wearing with sneakers.

2. My go-to sneakers: I got this pair recently, and they’re incredibly lightweight, and the design makes my runs feel easier. The bouncy sole propels me forward, if that makes sense? I feel well-supported. Also, they look cool, imo!

3. A nice sports bra and running shorts: Both impeccably made with great performance fabric. I love the lemony sage colorway of the bra, and the shorts are somehow both stretchy and compressive enough to fit like a glove.

4. A do-it-all water bottle: By now, you’ve likely heard of Owala, but in case you haven’t: I regret to inform you that it’s good. You can sip or gulp, and the little built-in carrying hook it has makes it all the more convenient for lugging around.

5. Post-gym shower beauty routine favorites: “Beauty routine” is generous, but I slap this trio on afterward: a tinted eyebrow gel, a tinted moisturizer with SPF, and a leave-in conditioner I decant into a travel bottle like I’m going somewhere glamorous. I liked this last one enough to ask for a discount code for Downtime readers, just in case. It smells like heaven. (It’s ALISHA15 for 15% off.)

6. Music: I don’t mind the Spotify Cardio playlist, but Chappell Roan is wonderful, and I maintain that 1989 (Taylor’s Version) is a perfect workout album, imo.

💬 Curious what your version of downtime looks like lately. What’s getting you through?

*Today’s post is in partnership with Bombas, a brand I’ve worn for years. Thank you for supporting the sponsors who help make Downtime possible.

Previously on Downtime

I Love a Book That Makes Me Think

A summer food bucket list, gorgeous galettes, and a curly hair hack